Dear John, 

 

We own a 3 year old  male neutered german shepherd, named Loki. We adopted him at 11 weeks old.

During the course of his life, my brother from Toronto and his two dogs visit on occasion.  All the dogs and people get along very well, In the past few months, my brother has been visiting more often and within the next few months, will be moving in with us. During these visits,  Loki spends all his time with my brother, both outdoors, following him everywhere he goes and inside, including sleeping in the same room despite that Loki has his bed in our bedroom and has always slept in our room.  My brother is big and has an assertive personality. When I let the dogs out of the dog run, all the dogs run past hubby and I and Loki almost "pees his pants" when he greets my brother.  I've nicknamed Loki "Traitor" because it seems he is so devoted to my brother.

 

My research on German Shepherds indicates they are one of the most loyal dogs to have for the family but this does not seem to apply to Loki. I'm a little concerned that while my brother stays here until things get better,  I will "lose" Loki to my brother. Am I being silly?

- Patricia

Dear Patricia,

In Norse mythology Loki also known as the trickster/traitor is the son of giants (your large brother) that turned against his brethren. Maybe you should change his name to another Norse god; Heimdall known for amongst other things; loyalty.

There are a two main reasons that this may be; imprinting or Loki's perception of your current relationship vs your mistaken perception.

Loki's imprinting period was almost over by the time you got him and he may very well been handled and cared for by someone with characteristics shared by your brother. The SPCA once seized a Rottweiler after its owner had been relocated to a place with bars for curtains. The dog had been left tied in the yard and behaved like a serial killer on crack so the neighbours had been using the proverbial 10' pole to push food and water to it. They ended up housing him in a horse stall in an empty barn. I was asked to have a look, so embracing my “run faster, live longer” life philosophy I peered into the stall and his attention switched from the others there to me and a switch went off in his brain but it was a good switch. He calmed down and wagged his entire bum.  There was just something about me that resonated and I'm betting it was a similarity between me and the doofus that had got himself tossed in jail. Maybe his previous owner also had the facial features of Brad Pitt and the body of an Olympian. There's no way of knowing what, but it was something.

More often then not though it's a leadership thing. Dogs like German Shepherds thrive on strong leadership and if they have to choose between a buddy and a leader it's the leader they'll choose. I'm guessing that you are a great care giver but aren't sending out the leader signals. Find a balanced trainer to show you how to teach Loki to heel off lead, stay for 10 minutes or more, drop quickly in a down even at a full run. If you can achieve that I doubt this will be an issue.

John Wade

www.johnwade.ca

Hi John,

I adopted an abused dog from the humane society in April and tried a couple of training classes but it wasn't specific enough to her needs. She is approximately two years old and was rescued from the states.  She is ok with my kids but not with myself or other adults and children. She will growl or bark in defence but has not yet bitten anyone and does not appear to have an aggressive nature (just a very fearful one) although she did mouth me in a warning once. She does not growl at me but is very nervous and will stay away or get out of my way. What can we do with our dog to help her out of her shell? We don't know much about her history of abuse just that she's very untrusting and I would like her learn to trust.

C.T.

Hi C.T.:

The whole “I rescued an abused dog” thing has always bugged me. Not because there aren't abused dogs but because it has become such an all encompassing term that we've stopped asking; exactly what is meant by abuse?” Is it neglect as in the sense of with holding of food, water and shelter? Is it physical depravity? Is it dumping or abandonment? The reason I think these are questions worth asking is because in the dog world the most insidious from of cruelty/neglect is psychological and it is never included in the definition and it is by far the most common quality of life impeding  and even life threatening form of abuse, more so then the rest combined. I suspect your dog like so many hundreds I've seen before is one of those.

A fearful response in a dog is rarely a result of having been beaten. It is almost always the result of having been socially deprived before 12 weeks of age. Whether one looks at psychologist Harry Harlow's experiments on depriving monkey's of maternal interaction or the Romanian orphanages created as a result of communist dictator, Nicolae Ceausescu policies or puppy mills or breeders that think puppy socialization classes suffice, the end result has always been the same; difficulty forming permanent attachments, fearful even panicked response to something new, abnormally long adaptation times.

Who's to blame? Ask rescues like the Association for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, breeders, dog trainers, veterinarians, veterinary and vet tech colleges, what socialization is and you'll learn who's to blame. They just don't know and more disconcerting,they more often then not; think they do. Many think “puppy socialization classes” fit the bill. Not even close. 

The end result are dogs like yours. Socialization is the single most important thing you can do for a dog. That means positively exposing puppies before 12 weeks of age to diverse sounds, sights, sounds and textures as frequently as possible. When this isn't done a dog's normal reaction is fear often resulting in aggression.

With dogs like these one thing that can help is leaving her leash on (supervised) so she can't avoid experiences that make her uncomfortable but can still keep some distance. Once she's collected herself see if she'll take something tossed to her by the “threat.” The idea is to keep her fear from taking on a life of its own. Teaching her a rock solid down stay can give her another “job” alternative to fleeing as well. You really should have a professional's help to get the best results and establish her limits.

Dear Mr. Wade,

 

I have an month old Labrador Retriever.  She does not see me as the alpha "dog" and only listens to me when she feels like it. I know that she  saw my ex as the alpha but it's just the two of us now and she's driving me crazy.

Jen

Hi Jen,

One word provides the answer – Clarity. Men without any conscious effort provide clarity. However, with the right sort of coaching, on average women are by far better dog trainers then we men are.

Those men that haven't been carried away “embracing their feminine side” send out “I'm in charge.”  Here's an example. A man and woman both have had a hard day at work. It's a problem and it's fresh. A man is going to come home and outline what a jerk the problem is and how unreasonable the jerk is etc. Then he tells his beloved precisely what he's going to do about it. It's probably not what he's actually going to do but he's “got a plan.” All this is going on while he's grabbing something to eat, answering or making a phone call, finding his hockey equipment etc. Now a woman with the same problem is going to take the phone off the hook and say to her husband,  “Sit with me. We need to talk.” If the fellow can get to the door (although he'll find it has been padlocked anyway) before she can get to him he avoid the marathon. If not, were he wise he would listen but not talk. Dogs may listen better to men but it sure isn't because we're wise. This hypothetical man will start in with, “Here's what you should do . . .” when she just wants him to listen. That in a nutshell is why dogs listen to men better then women and by no coincidence why so many men have become have ex-husbands and ex-boyfriends. In a dog's eyes, we provide clarity and women beat around the bush. Dog's see in us the potential for consequence.

Regardless, women have the potential to be better dog trainers then men because they see things that men don't see or we see too late. For example, a man and woman have come back from a social get together. The woman says to the man, “Did you see the way so and so was looking at so and so? A typical man's reply, “Were they there?” It's that ability to see nuance, something off in a child; did something happen at school? Are they coming down with something?” etc. This is an invaluable ability when training dogs. It allows the trainer to catch the idea before it turns into an action which leads to more subtle direction and quicker progress. However, it's useless without a woman embracing the male side of her personality.

This can be done without embracing flatulence, doing laundry only when the closet is empty and cleaning the tub only when you move. Femininity does not need to be cast aside. Just stop treating the dog like a child and start treating it like a boyfriend or husband that is being disrespectful and dismissive that needs to be set straight. I know you won't and you know you won't but your dog needs to believe for a couple of weeks that being cut loose is a real possibility. Otherwise you're just going to continue to be a door mat that provides meals and loving once in a while on another's agenda.

Here's a start. Leave a leash on your dog whenever you're together and absolutely insist the dog stay in one spot at each door way, the kitchen and the stairs until given permission to move and if you're having not luck in no more then 3 days contact a balanced trainer for help.